“It’s the end of an era,” said Appa (my father) and my aunt separately when I reached out to them after my grandmother’s funeral. It truly feels that way. Today’s funeral was a really elegant and lovely ceremony with heartfelt speeches from my uncles and my aunt in Toronto. My grandparents moved there when I was a little girl because the largest cluster of their children was there. Growing up, they would split their time between my nuclear family, and our family in Canada. Her funeral was attended by people in Canada who were local, and attended virtually by people living across the US, India, and as far away as Australia.
I got to know them both well as a result. I’ve always admired my grandmother’s strong spirit and intelligence, her wit and her charm. It felt desolate and strange to see her shrunken body in the casket during the virtually streamed ceremony without her liveliness, warmth and personality. Hard to imagine they were the same person.
The funeral rites ended as they moved her to the crematorium. And then she was gone. We were left with our memories, tears, sense of loss and regrets. I can feel her spirit, and I know her love is always there for me to remember. But every time I think about it, I choke up and start crying.
I’m truly grateful that I have close family and friends to count on and reach out to right now. I’m really lucky that I have so many good, kind, loving and generous people in my life.
Here’s to the end of the journey of a remarkable woman, who had a very difficult life but persevered with a deep love of life and an amazing sense of humor. I never saw a trace of bitterness for any of the pain she had suffered, and I’m truly inspired by her strength.
Today was a difficult day, and this week’s been more difficult than other weeks. Over the past few years and months, the unfair and harsh realities of life have become acutely clear, and my ability to cope has been truly tested.
One ray of sunshine is my latest release going live in a few hours. 🙂 This song is about loving yourself as you are, and accepting truths you can’t change and yet valuing your growth and potential no matter what other people say or do to you. It’s one of my favourites. I hope you all enjoy it and are able to find peace and joy this weekend.
We are now number 3 on the ReverbNation Indie charts for San Francisco, CA! Really grateful to everyone’s help in getting there. www.reverbnation.com/samaya2
Over the past couple of weeks I’ve watched our rank climb in the charts. I was stuck at 20something for a while. “Impossible” got a chance to be featured under Crowd Picks on ReverbNation last week, and we shot up to number 3 for the San Francisco Indie charts within a week. I haven’t had a lot of traction on other media channels like YouTube and Soundcloud, so it felt so good to see that a larger number people actually liked the music I was making.
I discovered one of my favourite bands a couple of months ago, Marian Hill. I went to watch Marian Hill and Jack Garratt play last Friday, and the show was amazing. Marian Hill, in particular, was great. The crowd was very inclusive and friendly, and the lead singer’s grandmother and aunt were in the audience right in front of us. It was a lot of fun to meet the band’s relatives and friends. The band members were also really friendly and took the time to speak to people at the show.
I went to see Woodkid live today. Great show, amazing music, but the coolest part was what happened after. I decided to stay after the concert (which I never do) to get autographs and chat with the musicians briefly if I could get the chance. I was one of the first people there, and started chatting with the pianist in the group, who happened to be the first musician to step outside. That conversation led to more with the other members of the band, and before I knew it I allowed myself to be led away to a 9 story mansion for an after party for the crew. Met super cool people, hung out with awesome musicians, and had the chance to give out my cards and CDs. Wow, I have no idea how that all happened. All I did was wait around at the right place at the right time.
It’s nearly 2 am…hello and a big kiss to one of the most beautiful days I have ever known.
So…I now have an EP that I really like. I think it’s good, people around me have been really positive and encouraging. But how do I get people to listen to it? Is it something that will actually sell? I can keep writing songs and making videos without giving any thought to selling because I love it, but I’m worried that at some point I will get distracted from what’s important, which is the making. It would be great if I could live off this too, though. 🙂
There’s so much I want to get done, and I keep stalling and being to stressed out to do anything. Argh. Generating ideas, but I need to nail down some of them to create concrete songs and videos. The music video for Night Time Story is proving to be a little more difficult than originally envisioned. Being a producer is a lot harder than being an artist, as I have immediate and absolute control over what I create when I’m doing my own work. Will keep chipping away at everything. Wish me luck. 🙂